Day 180: 6 months of walking and boy, am I sore!

I meant to weigh myself and remeasure myself on this grand occasion - 180 days of walking & blogging....but I forgot! I forgot today was the day. Oh, well, doesn't really matter since I am walking to walk, not for a number on the scale.

And yes, I am sore, but not from walking. Well, sometimes I am sore from walking, but not tonight. Tonight I am sore because in Kung Fu tonight we learned how to take a punch....I don't like taking punches. In fact, I don't take punches at all well. That probably did not surprise anyone.

Sifu Adams, our teacher, demonstrated the punching technique and I was the punching dummy. Actually, everyone got to take a turn doing the punching and being the punching dummy. I understand why we have to do it - I can not defend myself in a fight if I don't know how it feels to get hit (it hurts in case you didn't know). And if I am ever in a fight (man, I hope I never have to use this knowledge) then my reaction tonight is not going to help me...at all. Sifu hit me and I flinched, threw my arms across my chest and blurted "ow". Yeah, I'm tough.

I am not trying to beat myself up, just relate a story that demonstrates why I am sore tonight. But it also takes me to another point - Sifu said that how we perceive ourselves will change as we learn and master Kung Fu.

Right now I perceive myself as a weakling. Always have actually. If you got a room full of people in the room, I am probably the weakest one (there might be a few children I could beat, but not by much). If I see myself as weak, then I act as if I am weak.

Sifu Adams believes  that as I master Kung Fu my confidence will increase and my self image will change. I just might not see myself as the weakest one in the room....that would be nice.

I must admit, tonight, as I write this, I really just want to quit and keep being the weakest person in the room. My chest hurts. I don't ever want to hurt like this again. I actively avoid this kind of pain. But I am not going to quit. I am going to keep on practising and I am going to keep going to the Kung Fu class. Why? Because I have 3 children who need to see that I don't give up when things are hard or when they hurt or when they are uncomfortable. I also never want any of my children to feel like they are the weakest person in the room.

Happy Walking!