Day 97: Putting it all together, part 1

I love looking in the mirror and liking what I see. I really do. I like accepting me - the good, the bad & the ugly. I have really enjoyed my mini self discovery through colors, clothes & personalities. I really have.

Yet, deep down, I know it is not the complete answer.

The complete answer is my relationship with my Heavenly Father.

Does God care if I am a summer or a winter? Does He care if I am a task-oriented person or a person-oriented person? Does He care if my outward appearance reflects the inner me? Does He care if I have mastered the concept of "yes...and?"....I have no idea.

What I do know, is that God cares about me. I am a child of God and He loves me...that is a true statement.

Have you ever read the book, "You Are Special" by Max Lucado? It is a wonderful story about a village of wooden people (Wemmicks) & Eli, the woodcarver. In this particular book (there are several about the Wemmicks). We learn that Wemmicks like to put stars & dots on one another. You may get a star for how pretty you look..paint being smooth, etc... or you may get a dot because your paint is chipped. Punchinello has lots of dots & he is sad until the day he meets a girl Wemmick who doesn't have any stars or dots...they simply won't stick. Her secret is that she spends some time every day with Eli, the woodcarver. Punchinello visits the woodcarver & learns he is special because Eli made him. As Punchinello leaves a dot falls off.

My family loves this book. The moral of the story is also true. If we spend some time with our creator every day than the stars & dots won't stick to us.

In each of the books that I read & reviewed spoke of how life changing their theory and/or product was...got amazing results! The biggest one being people losing weight without even trying - pounds just slipping right off! I have no doubt that dressing better - dressing in a way that brings out our best features, our true beauty, our inner light - helps bring about big changes. When I am depressed & wearing pj's or sweats every day, I am not exactly feeling bright or happy or sexy or loved or anything really...just sadness.

But, clothes, make up, hair styles can only get you so far. The secret ingredient to any of the books...is learning to love yourself and see yourself as a child of God - and to know that He loves you.

Years ago when my children still took naps & quiet times, I would spend a good hour studying the scriptures (spending time with my creator). I was the exact same size I am today. I was not wearing any make up (still don't). I wore my hair long & unstyled (it is now short & unstyled...I hate hair products). I wore jeans & a t-shirt every day (still do). I was struggling to eat better, drink more water, sleep more, exercise more, be consistent with home school studies, be a kinder/more patient mother (still doing all of that....) and yet, I felt beautiful (hmm...not feeling that anymore).

I looked in the mirror and liked what I saw. I put clothes on and I liked how I felt. I felt like me inside & out...beautiful & loved. Today? I hate looking in the mirror, I despise pictures of myself (full disclosure: I haven't like pictures of myself since being pregnant...even during the above time period of knowing I was beautiful), dislike most of my clothes & how I look in them, I hate my glasses (but that is kind of a whole other issue)...well, you get the picture. Today, I see myself completely differently. Why? Because I do not spend the time with my creator. And all of the negativity I have ever heard or ever said about myself is coming back to me ten-fold. It is like being dumped with gray dots over my head every single day. And I desperately want a gold star!!!!

So, why do I mention this when I just got done raving about dressing books? Because I think I need to find a healthy balance.

I need the knowledge & the tools to dress my very best (not fancy, not expensive...just my personal best, even if that best is jeans & a t-shirt), to love my flaws, to love my quirks, to love my strengths, to love my assets, to look in the mirror or at a picture and be okay with the real me. But I also need to do that while I am spending time with my creator. As I use the tools & knowledge of personalities, colors & clothes while I am also spending time with God & losing those dots...then the doors of whatever awaits me will open.

I don't mean to sound all...I don't know...hmmm...mystic? conceited? don't know what I mean, but I don't mean to sound like it. I am just saying, that I know I felt beautiful once by spending time with my Heavenly Father every day. I know I will feel that way again. I just also feel that dressing true to me - my personality, my colors, my "yes...and?" will be the cherry on top. Gosh, I hope that makes sense!

This post is already really long...so I will continue tomorrow!

Happy Walking!